Have A Good Old Moan....

I feel awful and I have nobody to talk to at all.

I'm feeling really unsure about my engagement. I don't really know if the relationship is working out, or if we're really right for each other. The thing is, there's nothing actually wrong - he's kind, caring, supportive and lovely but I really don't know if we have anything in common anymore. I know that this was what I always wanted but now I have it I really don't know. It's been niggling away at me for months but I'm too scared to do anything about it. I can't picture life without him but I don't know if I can really see a life together either. I feel like such a horrible person for having these doubts, I know he's gone out of his way to make me happy and I feel like I'm ruining it. I just don't know if we'd carry on the relationship if we weren't engaged and that doesn't seem like good enough reason to go ahead. The worst bit is that we're supposed to be going on holiday together tomorrow and I really don't know if I can do it, I just want to stay at home and cry. I'm horrible and I'm disgusted with myself for thinking like this. I wanted to blame it on my MH problems or the amount of medication I'm on but I'm starting to feel like maybe the relationship has just burned out. I don't know what to do and it's horrible.

Oh Mouse, I'm so sorry 🙁 Realistically though it could be down to the meds, I know I have a tendency to drive people away and pick holes in relationships that aren't there when I'm not very well...I guess all you can do is think about whether the pro's of your relationship outweigh the cons? If its just the spark that's gone it's easily fixable - date nights, quality time together etc. It's always worth bearing in mind too that the grass isn't always greener on the other side, and a really good guy is worth his weight in gold (there are a lot of arseholes out there!) But similarly you can't stay in a relationship which doesn't make you happy! A holiday may be what you need to get the spark back? *hugs*

I don't know what to say about what you're feeling at the moment mouse, but from an outsider's view my advice would be to do what you feel is right. No need getting married now and 5 years later having had enough go through divorce. As selfish as it may seem think about yourself aswell as your partner. Weigh up the pros and cons, of both scenarios, and follow whichever one nags at you most, only you can decide.
My hubby and I have been married almost 2 years now, and he struggles with me sometimes, well alot of the time cause I know how I am to deal with sometimes, but we know deep down and don't feel regrets for anything.
I'd say before you leap fix what you are feeling first. Make sure it's right. In your head and heart!

Sorry I'm rambling and my sentences probably don't make any sense :S

EDit: exactly ^^^ xxRaaxx

I randomly came across this: http://givemewhitehair.tumblr.com/howto
The whole tone of it is just horrible! And I am not convinced by anything written in the article at all. Wow. Honestly it just really hacked me off!

In other news, I just had a pointless 5.5 hour meeting after work and am super tired 🙁

One last thing to add. She's really quite judgemental, but having mousy blonde hair she probably has no idea how hard it is for some of us to get our hair light enough for white.

God, I was just reading this and she is!

And she's not one to bash hairdressers when shes whacking on 10 vol that often!

Anywhoooo my moan, I am drowning in appointments for the kids, i cant even muster the energy to do something for me, ykwim?

Hate creepers on facebook 🙁 messaging me with disgusting things. Report and Bock!

missjoey, I love the roll at the front of your hair, gorgeous!

I miss my best friend so much 🙁 I saw her almost every day and we shared everything, from the best times to the big bad stuff via the totally inconsequential bits in the middle. I do not for one second regret moving countries to be with my OH full time but I could really do with a Hester hug today :'(

Thanks for your help guys, I actually spoke to him about it in the end and it made me feel much better about everything! He was very calm and logical about the whole thing which was actually sort of a surprise but made it all much easier. We've been together over 5 years so it seems stupid to throw everything away so quickly on a whim, so we're going to go on holiday and see how things go. It's been a really difficult year for us for many reasons, so whether it lasts or not, we've decided that it's sensible to leave it a little longer rather than hastily jumping into a big decision.

missjoey, I love the roll at the front of your hair, gorgeous!

Thank you 🙂 i feel silly going out with my hair anything like that though, my town isnt exactly alternative friendly. and i just feel to 'done up' if you know what i mean?

I know what you mean about being away from your best friend, one of my best friends in high school moved back to america. we skype and stuff but its just not the same

Hugs 🙂

missjoey, I love the roll at the front of your hair, gorgeous!

I miss my best friend so much 🙁 I saw her almost every day and we shared everything, from the best times to the big bad stuff via the totally inconsequential bits in the middle. I do not for one second regret moving countries to be with my OH full time but I could really do with a Hester hug today :'(

Hug! I understand I really balled my eyes out the day after finally seeing my Besty, She was the one to move out of the country to Islands like Guam, Hawaii, etc. Shweew I did get that hug this week and was energized the day after, then the next day I felt all those memories rush back & the time missed AH. Makes me want to scream in the wind! I think I have held those feelings in for xx years! :-[ Thankfully when with the person it is like they never left. A part of you!

Aww FizzWhizz! I totally get what you're feeling. Some days I am so homesick for my best friend. Communicating over email is not the same (she hates the phone, and realistically Canada is terrible for long distance calls and texts anyway). We don't have that same immediacy supporting each other anymore which sucks!

Mouse: you've been through some massive changes over the last year. Everyone has their wobbles (I had a huge one before moving to Canada with my OH), and I guess a little time will tell if its just a wobble, or game over. A holiday may be just what you need! I hope you figure everything out soon.

Oh Mouse, i hope this holiday is just what you both need!

I've just checked my Paypal, i bought DH something for £112....

They've taken double that amount, oh my god, i feel sick. RAGE!

Moderator combined posts.

That's so bad!! Pay pal have a habit of not taking my money right away so I think I have more money than I do >:(

I'm having a hard time atm, one of those weeks where nothing goes right. I've been feeling really down about myself. None of my clothes fit right, they're either too tight or too big (think I'm at an awkward in between size). No matter how much exercise I do my legs and arms just look huge and wobbly 🙁
Student finance are messing me around. I applied over 3 months ago and it's still processing apparently, my brother in law applied a moth after me and go his completed letter back 3 days ago.
And I feel lonely 🙁 my husband is working constantly so it's just me and the kids, the weather has been terrible so we've not been able to do anything. My friends seem to have forgotten about me.
But on the plus side I get to visit my best friend (she lives in Austria) in 3ish weeks so I'm lookin forward to that.

*hugs*

My moan is more pissed off. Today i had some male customers asking my collegue if my eyebrows are piercings, then i heard them ask if i have any others, beside my face. I carried on ignoring them. Then one of them came to my till to ask about my MD's & then asked if i had any other piercings that can't be seen. Seriously!? I thought i'd stopped being asked questions like this(the last being a few years ago asking if the carpet matches the curtains) But who's buisiness is it what piercings i may or may not have below the neck. I wish i could have said 'I don't see how that's relevant or your buisiness' but i just whimped out and said no. Men make me angry!

Urg that's vile. Why do people think they have the right to comment on your looks just because its slightly different to other people?

I will never comprehend that it's some how ok to ask 'weird' looking people. Some people really shouldn't be allowed to speak to others.