Have A Good Old Moan....

I'm getting seriously down again and I really can't afford it right now, I have very little time to finish my revisions on my thesis before resubmitting. I just feel under so much pressure, can't sleep at night and I feel exhausted all the time.
My mum keeps telling me to get on anti-depressants but I've been traumatised by my short experience with citalopram last year that gave me so much side-effects.

Janineb you obviously have some drama queen customers. Thankfully most people take the feedback on Etsy with a pinch of salt, particularly the negative comments.

Feeling a bit "should I bother" with my shop/website, not had a customer in ages and I'm starting to wonder if it's pointless and if I should try to get a "real" job

I feel like I'm right on the edge of an anxiety attack.

Janineb you obviously have some drama queen customers. Thankfully most people take the feedback on Etsy with a pinch of salt, particularly the negative comments.

lol just a few. Thankfully most of them are lovely. Just had more than my fair share of pain in the neck ones in the last few weeks. Better not go into it too much, but I had to refund someone last night because she had a hissy fit. She was a pain from the beginning with being picky about colours and seemed to be wilfully misunderstanding that I couldn't actually do what she wanted as I only have two shades of the colour and that's all I can get.

Glitter, January and even December can be great for some and tough for others. Maybe look for a part time job for a few hours a week? It's always my back up plan for rough times!

Feeling a bit "should I bother" with my shop/website, not had a customer in ages and I'm starting to wonder if it's pointless and if I should try to get a "real" job

Glitter, I've been feeling a bit like this as well since just before Xmas - so far in January I've only had one sale, even though I've been running a sale for the past week or so, and December wasn't a particularly good month for me either!  I just keep telling myself that come the end of January when alot of people get paid a full month's salary again and don't have to spend it on Xmas presents, etc, then sales should pick up! January is always a lean month for me personally, and I always seem to overspend at Xmas and have to pick up the slack in January, so I'd assume quite a few other people are in the same position!

Yeah I'm hoping that's it! I may have to look in to getting a part time job, though there's not much out there in my city at the moment. Chris says I need to just suck it up and get designing different stuff and see if it picks back up, he's probably right! Just having an off day where I'm thinking "what am I doing" I'll probably be back to loving it tomorrow 🙂

People panic buying because there's a lot of snow expected tomorrow. My local Tesco are completely out of bread and milk. I've had to make two hour walks in foot-deep snow before, so it's not impossible to do, so why can't people just do that or go to their local corner shop instead?

I'm skint at the min glitter just like everyone 🙂 don't worry, you will prob find feb is a good month! If it helps at all we've been really quiet at work too, seems no one is spending! We got paid just before Xmas, so it's been a reaaaaally long month!

design something for valentines day?

Really bad intrusive thoughts and my psychiatrist appointment is now scheduled for next week and lasts 90 minutes and I don't know how I'm going to cope. 90 minutes in some weird room with some weird stranger asking questions and making me talk about my horrible thoughts and I really don't want to be institutionalised so I don't know what I'm allowed to say and what I'm not and my fiance is asleep so I feel really alone.

*hugs everyone*

Mouse, I bet the thoughts that you think are weird are normal for someone who is suffering with anxiety and depression.  They only tend to hospitalise people if they're a threat to themselves or others, so as long as you don't plan on hurting anyone it should be fine.  I'm sorry that you have to wait so long to speak to them, though, but I bet when you do, if you're able to get out at least some of what you're thinking you'll find that they're normal thoughts and feel a bit of relief.

Have you tried writing stuff down mouse? I used to have a notebook that I wrote down my worst thoughts in and it helped a little as it was getting it out my head at least. Also if you find you do not click with your psychiatrist ask for a new one otherwise you won't be getting the best help you can get if you don't feel comfortable.

The problem is that a lot of my intrusive thoughts involve killing, either myself or other people. I'm not sure if I'm allowed to say that.

And the stupid snow means that the one thing I'd looked forward to this week can't happen. I hate everything right now.

Just tell them the truth, it may help you just saying it and getting it out. Hope you feel better soon though *hugs* My friend had a lot of thoughts like that, and it turned out to be a form of OCD.

I agree with Kittylost, writing thigs down may help you a bit. Also, when I had to see my doctor about depression stuff and she wanted to know things I found hard to talk about, I wrote them down and she read through them next appointment, and then we started talking from there

Anyway, I really hope things get so much better for you soon xx

Mouse, I voluntarily went to the Psych ER this past September for anxiety, and I told several strangers about my desires for death. They sent me home the following morning alone. They didn't even ask me to have someone pick me up. Generally, in the US, they don't commit you until you've acted upon violent thoughts unless you request it and convince them it's for your own safety. Don't know how it is over there, but I'm in the same boat right now, or will be when I get health insurance...