Have A Good Old Moan....

Speaking of sick, I need to get Logan and Violet to their Drs, they're both due for shots, but I am seriously dreading this appointment because every single time I take them to the Drs, I don't care how careful I am, they always end up coming down with something. It's a clean office, I don't understand how they always come down sick when we go there.

I don't like my job as it is but I think my hormones are rearing an ugly head and I've nearly shouted at my direct boss like 3 times and I've only been here about 3 hours, and I also hate hate hate, like actually despise our contracts manager and he started talking just now about some nonsense or other and I nearly blurted out 'why do you have to talk?!' which was meant to be in my head...I think I'm going to need my own room soon!

when I was pregnant with my first Son, I started to absolutely hate a guy at work with a vengeance,  looking back Ive now no idea why !  but I did, I couldn't even look at him some days...  LOL  - poor bloke.. everything he did just rubbed me up the wrong way..  just his face used to drive me insane  LOL.

If they're going for shots they could be reacting to those maybe?

No, I'll take them in just for their regular checkups to have their weight/height measured, ears, eyes, nose + chest checked + they'll still come down with something 🙁 Logan usually gets a slight temperature the night after he gets shots though. But it's always a few days later, shots or no they come down with something and it drives me nuts. I hate seeing them sick + having to use that sucky thing on their noses - they hate it 🙁 I'm trying so hard to teach Logan to blow his nose right now. I remember when I learned how to blow my nose, it was the greatest thing ever lol

Really been down last 6mths on anti deps now, they just kicking in. My BF is now disabled in wheelchair can only walk few steps is in constant agony  🙁
He has something called AVN in both hips/ knees and needs double hip replacement. Its really upsetting seeing the person you love in so much pain and unable to do things he used to do, its heartbreaking.
Just over 1 year ago he was riding his bike walking everywhere. Its amazing how things can change, and not to take things for granted.
He's extremely depressed understandably, GP gave him anti deps but he had bad reaction to them, he's waiting to go for counselling.
He's having steroid injections in hips next Weds for pain, really hope they work.

It's hard becoming a responsible person. I'm not saying adult because I know some adults aren't reliable.
I'm a bit lost, I'm just 18 and I find life is hard when I can't trust my mother and my father is dead.

It's hard keeping in touch with friends when they all see each other and you are away most of the time.
It's hard going to school without anyone to chat with inbetween classes.
I'm tired...

It gets very tiring when people try to bring you down. I'm just really sick of people - the drama, people talking about you behind your back instead of to your face for whatever reason I have no idea, people begging for money all the time, friends dying/overdosing, sick of people (strangers AND family) stealing from us, sick of this state and country + it's "wonderful" obamacare BS. I have MS that hasn't 'progressed enough' to be technically diagnosed for me to be able to get care for it so I'm stuck feeling like absolute h*** until I can actually afford to be able to get tested again in a year to see if they can actually have the visual evidence to dx me. Numb hands/fingers, extreme completely random pain for hours/days/weeks/months at a time that will disappear then random ones surface, disappear and it's just never ending. It's like people don't give a crap about what someone else may be going through day to day before they steal/judge/ or act...that's why I'm nice to people and I don't try to bring others down in any way. You never know what kind of battle a person is dealing with.

Katie - Could you not try something for the pain like a hot water bottle to ever so slightly ease it? Or try deep breathing exercises? Just until you can get a diagnosis? Has your doctor said you actually have MS, maybe it could be another similar thing? I find that things like hot water bottles, hot baths, meditation and candles help me with pain and stuff

Moonfairy - I hope your husband feels a bit better once the antidepressants start to work for him.

Hexialyse - hope you feel happier soon too x

Thanks for your concern Glitterpix 🙂 I've tried what feels like absolutely everything, it's just so difficult because one minute I'll be fine, then the next it feels like I have a fire in my spine between my shoulderblades that literally nothing takes care of, not even pretty serious painkillers, that can last on and off for a few weeks, or I'll have a migraine for a week, my left arm will feel like my bones are bruised and aching, or just one specific area on my arm or leg, or my hands will be so numb I can't sleep for days, or I'm so fatigued all the time I can't stay awake, it will feel like I'm getting shocked by electricity or like something is biting me, my leg from the knee down will feel like I have growing pains/shin splints x 10, and it all just comes and goes or sticks around, some things don't seem to ever really go way or they'll be solid for a period of time then just vanish.....it feels like I live in someone else's body + like I have no control over it. It's like someone took my nerve endings and stuck them in an electrical socket. I look like I'm drunk a third of the time when I walk + constantly drop absolutely everything...I've tried baths, salts, color/aromatherapy, massage, meditation, different medications....the only thing that seemed to help somewhat was gabapentin but it makes me very, very, very tired which doesn't help the extreme fatigue at all, and after a while it didn't seem to help much at all + I really do not want to keep upping the doses if the smallest dose makes me feel like I have narcolepsy. I've just never experienced anything like this before + its been going strong for the past 3-4 years. My neurologist has to be able to see the demyelination. They scanned my brain but not my back at all, and in the brain he couldn't make out enough of anything to actually dx me. He said I'll just have to wait until he can actually see the progression of lesions. So until then I'm just stuck. It makes me feel depressed and guilty too because I'm just hurting all the time + if I overdo it I pay for it for the next couple days, I can't do a third of any of the things I used to be able to do, I feel like I'm cheating my kids because I just can't be as physically active with them as they deserve and it really gets me down. If I try and push myself to really play with them like how they want then I'm hurting so bad wherever the pain may be at at that time for the next couple days it makes me feel even worse...I just hate it so much, I really feel like I'm living in someone else's body

Have you tried napping occasionally? even if it's like 10 mins of each day or something, ay help with the fatigue? Or maybe for the pains try the opposite of hot baths and do ice packs? I mean, obviously if you have large scale pain it's not going to take it away, but may reduce a teensy bit of it. Have you been checked for any other things, if they're not sure you have MS? Maybe try to see a different doctor that could figure things out sooner?

I deffo can vouch for meditation/deep breathing for pain though, obviously you're still in pain, but the calmer you can get your body when it's in pain, the less you feel it.

Yeah I've seen a few and they all suspect the same. It's pretty common for people with MS to not be able to get a proper diagnosis for 3-10 years, depending on what kind of MS they have. My Mom and cousin were in this same situation before, it took my Mom going blind in one eye + going to the hospital for it to finally get a proper dx, after battling the same crap for 5 years. They've done a lot of different tests and everything else comes back normal, that's why they think it probably is MS. I belong to a few MS pages/groups on facebook too and it seems like it's actually rare for someone to just BOOM get a diagnosis, that it's common for most to just have to deal with it for some years before an MRI of their CNS or a spinal will show anything conclusive. I'd rather suffer than get a spinal though, my goodness I hate those things!!!! Anything inserted into the spine is just terrifying to me. From my last c section when they injected the numbing stuff into by spine (last July) it still hurts, just in that one specific area, like a hollow burning sensation + I definitely do not want another one + start forming a collection lol.

Thank you though, I think I will try giving meditation a try again. I know the calmer I am the better my body feels. It seems like stress (which I feel often lol) really flares things up, especially when I'm stressed out BIG time over a week or so, things get bad. Thanks for your advice! It means a lot 🙂

Am frustrated about my job. I study (dual system) so I can't change the job before I'm done in 1,5 years. It's always 3 months in the company and 3 months studying. So for the phases in the company we always get a project and we were told we could choose which.
But my problem is with my boss. He gives me a project, the one I always wished not to get and several of my colleagues were interested in. It's not the first time either, last time projects were assigned I also got the one I didn't want.
And as I work alone in that project he's supposed to help me. But he has no time whatsoever so I have a hugeee list of questions and can't do anything any further before I get these answers. So the last 3 weeks or so I'm just sitting around doing basically nothing, surfing around and wasting time etc. And even if I had the answers I'm not motivated at all to do this crappy project, I know it won't lead to anything or produce anything. I told my boyfriend about it, and he thought I just had a terrible morale about working and was lazy or something. Then this weekend I helped him with his work (building architecture models) and I was so motivated and had so much fun doing things on my own after he explained them etc. So it's definitely not me lacking morale.
I already went to the boss a few times and asked him if I could get another project, if only until I had the answers to continue, but he never had time to even give me an answer. I feel terrible for wasting so much time with doing nothing, just want to do something that makes sense and I don't know what to do anymore :/

Am frustrated about my job. I study (dual system) so I can't change the job before I'm done in 1,5 years. It's always 3 months in the company and 3 months studying. So for the phases in the company we always get a project and we were told we could choose which.
But my problem is with my boss. He gives me a project, the one I always wished not to get and several of my colleagues were interested in. It's not the first time either, last time projects were assigned I also got the one I didn't want.
And as I work alone in that project he's supposed to help me. But he has no time whatsoever so I have a hugeee list of questions and can't do anything any further before I get these answers. So the last 3 weeks or so I'm just sitting around doing basically nothing, surfing around and wasting time etc. And even if I had the answers I'm not motivated at all to do this crappy project, I know it won't lead to anything or produce anything. I told my boyfriend about it, and he thought I just had a terrible morale about working and was lazy or something. Then this weekend I helped him with his work (building architecture models) and I was so motivated and had so much fun doing things on my own after he explained them etc. So it's definitely not me lacking morale.
I already went to the boss a few times and asked him if I could get another project, if only until I had the answers to continue, but he never had time to even give me an answer. I feel terrible for wasting so much time with doing nothing, just want to do something that makes sense and I don't know what to do anymore :/

If you expressed a disinterest/dislike in that particular project, your boss may have assigned it to you to see how you perform with work you don't really want to do, as a type of test.

Don't waste your time even if your boss/mentor isn't providing you with the answers.  Again, this may be a test to see just how resourceful you are.  Are the answers something you can look up on the internet?  Are they things that you can find in trade magazines or websites?

If it's about the presentation of the project and he won't get back to you with specifics, there is nothing stopping you from creating a rough draft.  My bosses expect me to come to them with a first copy, then they tell me what changes they want and I implement them.  I would think your boss would expect something similar.

I'm guessing you're in some sort of graduate programme, with three months studying and three months in the business alternating.  If this is the case, then your bosses expect you to show some initiative and resourcefulness--you're expected to be able to take your development in to your own hands and solve problems, as well as to be able to produce quality work even if it's something you don't like doing.

It does sound like you are lacking in motivation and morale for this project.  You say you're not, but you had motivation and morale for your boyfriend's project--clearly, you haven't got the same sort of drive with your own, as you keep finding excuses not to do it.  You're wasting your time on the internet instead of trying to use it to your advantage.  You may feel bad about not being able to do anything, but honestly, the only person in control of what you do or don't do with regards to your job and how you manage your time is you.  Just because you're stuck doesn't mean you have to stop.

Silly moan but I wish these spots would go away! Ever since I started taking birth control I've had bad spots on my chin 🙁 I've never suffered with any kind of acne before.

You should try another pill until you find "the one" if the current one is giving you issues 🙁