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Author Topic: Funerals and bright hair  (Read 884 times)  Share 

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  • Dye-Hard
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Funerals and bright hair
« on: 11 Jun 16 / 08:40 PM »
Odd topic I know! But I'm just wondering if any of you ladies have been to a funeral with your bright hair? My boyfriends granddad has passed away so we have his funeral to go to but I'm super nervous about going with bright hair. I don't want to be disrespectful. I've been to multiple funerals of my family members with bright pink hair but everyone knows me and didn't care at all, but his family are quite old fashioned and conservative.
 

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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #1 on: 11 Jun 16 / 09:07 PM »
Yes, one in my own family and one in my husband's family with lots of people I didn't know. The family members of the husband's that I did know did not mind or said anything about it and I heard nothing from others or afterwards. I wouldn't say that family is old fashioned or conservative though, but I did struggle with the same idea. I asked my family-in-law if they would like it if I wore a hat and they told me not to worry. If you are worried you might want to ask your boyfriend or family members of his that you do know if they would maybe like it if you wore a hat or something.

I don't think this is an odd topic really, I have struggled with this twice now. I was planning on dying my hair black when a loved one in my own family passed away, but before she went, she said I should not do that because she loved the bright. So I didn't and on the day itself I was not thinking of it at all.

The husband's family was a bit different since I didn't know half of the people there (his uncle passed away), but we were asked to sit at the front, so I'm sure I didn't go unnoticed and I was worried a bit. But in the end, I was focussed on the people who were speaking and I'm sure the others were too, why would they pay attention to someone they don't know with odd hair when someone they loved passed away? I try to see it this way. But I didn't have to deal with old fashioned or conservative opinions.

I'm sorry for your and your boyfriend's loss :(
 

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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #2 on: 12 Jun 16 / 03:19 PM »
I'm sorry for your loss, I don't really have a similar experience as I'm from a small family who are all quite eccentric so there's never much question of people not being accepting of the way I dress but I think if you dress smartly in something conservative and black (and make sure it's not too 'gothy') then tie your hair up it will be fine, but if you are self-conscious perhaps a small hat and your hair in a bun? A little beret or something similarly not trendy would probably work, but I think something like a wide brimmed hat could look like you wanted to be in American Horror Story Coven or something. I think the important thing is that you will be there supporting your boyfriend and paying your respects and hopefully they will just appreciate that.
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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #3 on: 12 Jun 16 / 03:57 PM »
I second Lauralei. Hair tied back in a more conservative manner and a beret if it's not too hot. I don't really like pandering to other people who look down upon more alt dress styles, but avoiding any conflict at a funeral is definitely a thing I give an exception to :)

I think I'd actually avoid black, but if you have something navy or dark green it would be fine, or at least not all black. You don't have to wear black these days, and I know from experience, even if you wear something really normal but all black with bright hair people will think you're being all gothy anyway. It's silly. I got asked several times if I was a goth, which was even more bizarre lol
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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #4 on: 13 Jun 16 / 11:58 AM »
I think the last funeral I went to I still had pink hair.  I just wore it tied back in a sleek ponytail. For clothes I wore a black pencil skirt and a white shirt, just pretty basic. I wouldn't worry too much, I think people will be glad you're there paying respects
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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #5 on: 13 Jun 16 / 07:41 PM »
Thanks everyone :)
 

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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #6 on: 14 Jun 16 / 03:30 PM »
I had blue hair at my grandmother's funeral and one of her oldest friends, 97-year-old Lois, came over and made a point of telling me how lovely she thought it was :)
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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #7 on: 28 Jun 16 / 10:56 AM »
When i lost both my mum & dad and it was their funeral i had bright hair (4yrs ago now) I personally dyed it dark - it wasnt fully because of the funeral, it was more on how i was feeling, i had lost my parents i didnt wanna be bright because i was deeply sad and at that time my hair didnt fit my personality or feelings. Took me about a year before i went back to colour, but thats me personally. No matter what you do there is no right or wrong, go with how you feel about it. And i'm sorry for you & your partners loss.
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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #8 on: 28 Jun 16 / 09:08 PM »
Thank you everyone! The funeral was today, I was put more at ease when I was told that the men would be wearing bright coloured ties as my bf's granddad was an artist and loved bright colours! Also when we got there I don't think I saw one person wearing all black, everyone had some sort of colour and even the widow had bright red on her dress. So I didn't feel too awkward or anything with my blue hair.
 

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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #9 on: 28 Jun 16 / 09:25 PM »
Oh that's lovely :)
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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #10 on: 29 Jun 16 / 11:20 AM »
That's such a lovely idea to remember someone who was an artist!


When it was my gran's funeral my brothers and I dressed in a way people would probably have found a bit strange (I had a very nipped in, almost corset suit with a black shirt and white tie and some pretty extreme stiletto shoes) but my gran had been a seamstress and had modeled for the places she had worked so she was very into fashion,particularly 40's and 50's,  so it felt right. (until I sunk in the mud graveside and the funeral director had to drag me out, and my brother who wasn't used to wearing brogues fell over - both of which served to lighten the mood somewhat!)
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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #11 on: 25 Jul 16 / 08:51 AM »
My mother is from a conservative family in the Philippines and they have a lot of superstitious belief. When my grandmother died we had to fly to Bicol a province from central Philippines. People are staring at my light brown hair like it's their first time to see a hair color like that. Apparently, my hair is causing much attention that my mother asked me to just stay inside our room. I didn't bring enough dark colored clothes also so I had to go to the city to buy a lot of black shirts since the weather is so hot when we came that I had to change every now and then.
 

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Re: Funerals and bright hair
« Reply #12 on: 08 Aug 16 / 04:51 PM »
I know you handled the funeral like a pro with your awesome bright hair-- just wanted to give a little piece of advice. If you ever come across this again you can buy one of those Halloween hairsprays that color your hair. They do sell them in black. ;) You can always put it on your hair for the service and wash it out when you get home.

Did it for court a couple of times  :-X :o :laugh: :P 

Didn't want the judge judging me on appearance. lol
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