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Author Topic: Style crisis - Please help! :(  (Read 2694 times)  Share 

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Style crisis - Please help! :(
« on: 03 May 14 / 10:35 PM »
Hey everyone, my name is Lauren and I'm coming up for 21 years old soon (2nd of July), and it's just dawned on me, I have absolutely no idea what to wear!
Throughout my teenage years I was a typical "Goth", dark hair, panda eyes... Every town has one, and in my town it was me.
But lately I've noticed my style changing a bit, perhaps "maturing", and I'd like to start dressing my age a little more. Up until now I've always had a certain vendetta against colours and patterns other than lace, stripes or polka dots, but lately I've found myself wanting to explore them all, but I'm way too much of a chicken, plus I really have no idea what suits me any more.
Peeling back the layers of dark make-up and clothes has left me feeling a little naked and confused about my identity, and while I still love the music and atmosphere the Gothic style has, I just don't have time to sit and primp myself to perfection every morning.
I'm just having a little trouble getting comfortable in my own skin again, and I'd like some opinions from an outsider. Currently, I'm 5"5/6, a UK size 12 and have a pretty basic "hourglass" figure. Any suggestions?
Here's a picture of me from not so long ago (college):
I know you're just pretending death
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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #1 on: 03 May 14 / 11:03 PM »
There's nothing wrong with your style changing as you get older, and there are still plenty of ways to express your individuality without going full on gothic. I'm in my 30's now, and like you, in my late teens & early twenties, I did the full on goth thing. As I've gotten older, I've transitioned more to a rockabilly/pinup/psychobilly style instead. I still add in gothic bits and pieces, but overall, I tend to wear more colour and prints. I don't like to categorize myself into just one particular style, as I tend to mix it up depending on how I feel like dressing on any given day. If you're looking for some inspiration (shameless self-promotion plug coming up!), I run an online alternative clothing store, www.littlewickedsemporium.co.uk - you may find some pieces there that help to inspire you!
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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #2 on: 04 May 14 / 12:17 AM »
I feel your pain  - in my late teens and early 20s I had an ongoing internal argument about what I should look like, what other people wanted me to look like, what I wanted to look like, what my friends looked like compared to me. I lived with uni students and fitted in with their lifestyle, but I had a full time professional job - I wanted to look fun but grownup, professional but not old before my time...

These days I love all kinds of styles, and vary between goth, rockabilly, smart grown-up, grunge and floral old lady!

On a more practical note - going without the 'big' make up after such a long time can be very daunting, but so long as you have a good base (light foundation or powder) there is very little else you need to do. 'Healthy' looking just means a little bit of blusher or bronzer. If you don't have time to do full on eyeliner, just a light coat of mascara on your top lashes and some pencil liner on the inside of your upper lids can give you a natural look that's just enhancing what you already have. Looking at your other posts you have stunning eyes so please don't feel like you need lots of make up!!

Clothes wise, I think you'd suit most styles, but it is easier to go for simple and add to it than to dive right in to a completely different look.

I hope I've been of some help :)

 

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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #3 on: 04 May 14 / 01:31 AM »
I dare admit, I'm in my 40s, and my style changes so often - not drastically, but I find I'm always inspired by certain types of clothes.  I've been through phases with sexy lace, sparkles and sequins, fur, chiffon blouses, peplum tops, bandage skirts and tights, skinny trousers, chunky jumpers, smart cardigans, flannel shirts, waist coats, high heels, boots, you name it.

I just find that wearing whatever inspires me at the moment makes me feel best, so that's the advice I can give.  Go with it... make a change that is comfortable and most importantly expresses who "you" are - whether it be this year, or this month, or this week, or just only today!

And as far as makeup, if it's uncomfortable to go with a full-out change from goth to less-goth, make small changes gradually so that you can get used to it until you are the "you" that you feel best being.
Hair reminds you just how much "patience is a virtue"...

Oh yeah, so these two men walk into a bar: you think one of them would have ducked. ::)
 

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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #4 on: 04 May 14 / 02:04 AM »
I was also a teenage Goth (although  would never have admitted it at the time, the term was used solely as an insult back then  lol)
My style changed and evolved as I grew older, I wore less of the formal, Victorian gothic style, and full face make up, and got more casual. So more leggings and jumpers, less lace and velvet. I also got more grungy (early 90s by now) with a dollop of psychedelic (think Dee Lite) After that I went more hippyish with a lot of paisley and Indian fabrics, long flowing skirts with tight tops, big boots and a leather jacket. After that more Rock chick, tight jeans, band tees, mini skirts.
I never made a conscious decision to change, these changes just happened gradually over time.
My advice would be to wear anything that you love, whether it goes with your 'look' or not. We are all multi-faceted, and our clothes express us, so it is totally fine to have different looks for different moods.
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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #5 on: 06 May 14 / 05:17 PM »
Thank you for the kinds words everyone, I'm getting there slowly, it's just going to take time :)
@Mindi -  I will have a wee look see next time I get paid :)
@KatyPockets - Thank you so much! I've had people accuse me of wearing contacts before, my eyes are just a really natural bright blue, haha!
@Alexia - it's comforting to hear that from an older lady, and I bet you looked fab in it all.
@Pixie - YES! Haha, goth was only ever an insult to me too. Thank you, as well :)

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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #6 on: 06 May 14 / 05:52 PM »
I am LOLing at Alexia being called an older lady, she is the same age as me :D
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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #7 on: 07 May 14 / 02:08 AM »
Tehe, sorry!!
I know you're just pretending death
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I know you see right through me
There's no promise left to break
 

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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #8 on: 28 May 14 / 11:52 AM »
My suggestion would be...walk into a shop and pick up as many things as you can, try them on, see how they feel/look and if itís how youíd like to look then buy it. Maybe try Primark (or equivalent) while youíre trying things out so it doesnít turn out too expensive though to be honest I donít find much difference in price from Primark to New Look/H&M anymore!

I have always dressed however I felt, as a teenager/young adult one day I could be in a denim mini, fluffy white boots and a plain top, the next I could be in pink chords with a logo top and then another day I could just be in jeans, plain top and a blazer, almost always topped off with hats and a dummy on a necklace chain...literally no idea why! Then 6th form came along and god forbid I found fish net tops...yep, wore these a lot (think Avril Lavigne), how my parents let me out the house I will never know! When I got to uni I realised I was never actually wearing clothes that suited my tiny frame (size 6 and 5Ē2) so thatís where I found ripped low (looooooooooow) slung jeans and different t shirts or dresses, dressed like this for a couple of years then when I became single I got a bit rockier with everything I wore and everything got a bit shorter as well, without even realising that it happened and Iíve carried on like that since really, but things have gotten longer, other than during pregnancy. Big jewellery, blacks, greys, whites, long band t shirts, usually teamed with skinny jeans, used to be shorts but my legs have gotten a bit chunkier haha and either calf high heeled boots or dolly shoes.

Itís just a case of finding whatís right for you, you donít need to fit a stereotype but I guess it would be difficult if thatís always been your case, if youíre wary of just walking into a shop and buying things because thatís what you think you should do, do some magazine flicking and find someone who you think looks good, then have a google of them and see where you want to go from there.
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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #9 on: 28 May 14 / 01:12 PM »
I am LOLing at Alexia being called an older lady, she is the same age as me :D

LOL, just seen this. Yeah, can't really get used to calling myself an older lady just yet, maybe in my 50s, but ask me then and I still will not be used to the phrase!
Hair reminds you just how much "patience is a virtue"...

Oh yeah, so these two men walk into a bar: you think one of them would have ducked. ::)
 

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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #10 on: 28 May 14 / 01:34 PM »
We are in our prime :)
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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #11 on: 28 May 14 / 01:54 PM »
Couldn't agree more, WickedPixie... *cheers* :-*
Hair reminds you just how much "patience is a virtue"...

Oh yeah, so these two men walk into a bar: you think one of them would have ducked. ::)
 

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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #12 on: 28 May 14 / 07:25 PM »
I think I've found my "style icon" guys...

Her name is Jane Levy, she plays Tessa Altman on Suburgatory, and I've always admired her style, so I think if I stick to the kinds of things she wears I'll be ok. Also, when I finally settle on a red hair dye I like, I might be able to pull off some of the colours she does!
I know you're just pretending death
There's no window for mistakes
I know you see right through me
There's no promise left to break
 

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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #13 on: 29 May 14 / 06:11 AM »
Love the skirt... really cute outfit!
Hair reminds you just how much "patience is a virtue"...

Oh yeah, so these two men walk into a bar: you think one of them would have ducked. ::)
 

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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #14 on: 29 May 14 / 04:29 PM »
Oh gosh, I love her character!
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Re: Style crisis - Please help! :(
« Reply #15 on: 31 May 14 / 11:05 AM »
Oh, yes!  Get some cute skater skirts and fitted tops, you can't really go wrong with that look!

Bit late to this thread, but I was very much a goth/grunge type back in school ... I still sometimes am, but I embrace anything I find cute now, so my style varies.  I'm just me, really :D.
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